Why is the term “Straight Acting” used within the gay community? People may disagree with me, but this term is wrong and should not be tolerated, it only further divides and bashes the gay community.
The term ‘straight acting’ usually describes a gay or bi man who does not exhibit the appearances or mannerisms of the 'gay stereotype' (Boreham).
Problem #1: It's impossible for a gay man to be straight acting, unless you are actually straight and have sex with women; you are NOT straight.
Problem #2: Some 'straight acting' gay men use this identity to 'pass' so people can't identify them as being gay. Which can be used as a form of self-hatred, but you’re only hurting yourself, if you’re just 'acting' all of your life then no one will ever know your true self and neither will you.
Problem #3: Last I Checked: 'Straight acting' gay men still like having sex with other men; just because a gay man is masculine does not mean that he is better than any other gay man.
Problem #4: Even though the terms Masculine and Feminine are problematic in their own right, these terms are so much better to use instead of 'straight acting'.
Problem #5: No matter how you frame the term 'straight acting'; it is still a term that is demeaning to all gay people, masculine or feminine. The term is rooted in the idea that straight men are better than gay men.
In the book Sissyphobia: Gay Men and Effeminate Behavior by Tim Bergling, he states “If we ourselves can't embrace, even celebrate, the differences we find within our own family (Gay Community), how can we expect an often mystified, and sometimes hostile, straight world to ever fully welcome us into its fold or, conversely, just leave us the hell alone” (3) ? Bergling is so right, if we continue to promote hatred within the gay community through these terms, how can we ever grow as a community and get more people within the straight community to start accepting us. Some people say that the term 'straight acting' is acceptable because people have the right to their own identity or preference in who their attracted to. I completely understand everyone does have a right to their own preference in men or identity, I know I do. But when the terms people use go from just being a preference to discriminating against others in the gay community that is where the problem lies. Andy Boreham states, “The term 'straight acting' is based in misogyny and a fear of possessing feminine traits” (aaronandandy.com). Most gay men use this term to reassert their normative hegemonic masculinity; it's hard enough to be a man attracted to other men, so some gay men use this term to ensure that they are not seen as a 'stereotypical' effeminate gay man and that they only exhibit masculine traits.
Some men who identity as 'straight acting' think that 'stereotypical' gay men who are effeminate are just putting on a show or just acting. I really think it doesn't matter whether you are acting masculine or feminine, if you are acting or putting on a show in anyway besides just being you’re true self that is WRONG. Whatever you identify as that is great, be yourself, but do not think that you have to put on an act or be someone you’re not whether it is to fit into a gay stereotype or to a subvert stereotype. The only way to really rise above is to just be you and to not let others sway that in anyway. Using negative and disrespectful terms like 'straight acting' to identify yourself or someone else has to stop because in the end it just reinforces the negative stigma that is placed on gay men.
Works Cited
Bergling, Tim. Sissyphobia: Men and Effeminate Behavior. New York: Southern Tier Editions, 2001.
Print
Boreham, Andy. "Gay New Zealand on the Web!" Aaron and Andy.com. 10 Feb. 2012. Web. 19 Apr.
2012. <http://aaronandandy.com/>.